Friends and family

I've been on the verge of tears most of this weekend, but thankfully, a lot of it was for good stuff. A big group of us threw a surprise birthday party for Pinkie K's 35th, and seeing how truly surprised, excited and touched she was gave me chills. She's the best and we all made it a point of telling her so. Shouldn't everyone be celebrated that way once in awhile? It takes so little and the impact is immense. I won't forget the smile on her face when she came in, saw us, and shouted, "Shut UP!" So cute. Funny what will come out of a person's mouth when they're shocked.

I steeled myself all day to call home and talk to my father. I talked to my brother first to get some courage from him. I admire the way he says some of the things that I can never say to my dad. Conversations between my father and me are few and far between, and generally don't go well. My mom was so excited that I called, I could almost hear her jumping up and down. When he got on the phone, I said, "Happy Father's Day?" It came out so strangled but things went better after that. I told him I loved him and he said the same to me. All I can say is WOW. Just wow.

So I've been thinking about the men in my family. On this father's day, my brother, who wants to be a father so badly, is dealing with the fact that he and his girlfriend recently lost their baby. If there's anyone who will be the most fantastic father, it's him. He's the most kind, loving, sincere guy I know, and I'm so glad I didn't succeed in murdering him when we were 13 and 10. I admire and love him and I know they'll be the proud parents of some lucky, lucky kids some day soon. And my dad and I had a breakthrough. I'm still digesting it. Little did I know when I woke up today how momentous it would be.