D-I-V-O-R-C-E

Does it happen to everyone? It seems so. The only question is when. Close friends I've known for 15 years and who've been married for eight, are splitting. Two little kids and a third party involved. The judgments, tears and pain are in full force. I can't stand to watch/hear them go through it all, after being part of them growing up together and all the good times. My step-sister is going through a similar situation. Two little kids and a mother who now won't speak to her because she disapproves of how she's handling her life. How a 39-year-old woman is handling her own life. How can people who love each other be so judgmental and cut each other out of their lives, just when the need for support is greatest? Smart girl and her husband are separated and thinking that a move to another state might fix things. You take your problems with you, though, and then add new ones.

You can never know what goes on between two people behind closed doors, and trying to figure out what might have led to a final split is a waste of time. One thing I have learned in the last year, in a number of ways, is that judging has no place in the equation. Being there to listen is the best you can do, I think. Of course, that can be tricky when you love both parties.

I was talking to my mother about all this, and she gave me a word of warning, "Be careful, divorce is catching." She may be right.